I Ate Everything At Rainforest Cafe And It Was Truly Wild

While the beef lava nachos and cheese sticks look tempting, the flatbreads are the shining stars of the appetizers. This mozzarella flatbread is topped with marinara sauce, arugula, thick shavings of parmesan, and balsamic glaze. Nothing about it is tropical, but it is damn delicious.

Repeat after me: Skip the dips and order the flatbreads! If you aren't into arugula, order the shrimp scampi flatbread. The alfredo sauce is rich and creamy but the red onions, red pepper flakes, and green onions add some zest and freshness to break it up.

I hate to use clichés but... go big or go home. If you're going to a rainforest-themed restaurant that has a thunderstorm every 19 minutes and gorillas thumping behind you, you're going to need this frozen margarita topped with a mini Corona (a Coronita!). This one unfortunately does not include a souvenir glass but it does come in three flavors: Original, blue, or strawberry.

I'm still puzzled by what a "Hawaiian glaze" is but I can tell you the sauce is buttery, nutty, and tangy. The glaze is so sticky, giving the shrimp a candied texture.

Don't bother with the chicken option and go straight for the beef. The steak is tender and doesn't need all the dressings on the side. This is the most well-rounded dish on the menu because of the variety of toppings. It sounds like a grocery list cataloging it all: grilled onions, bell peppers, sour cream, guac, lettuce, cheddar, pico de gallo, rice, black beans, and flour tortillas.

This half rack of St. Louis-style pork spare ribs is juicy, tender, and on the sweeter side. You'll definitely have leftovers from this one.

This is an incredibly accurate name for this menu item. Other restaurants typically make two thin patties when they create a double burger; at Rainforest Cafe it's two regular-sized, thick-as-all-can-be patties. The thick-cut cheddar helps balance all the beef but you'll most likely need a helping hand to tackle this.

Between the shrimp, andouille sausage, and chili butter bread crumbs, it's nearly impossible to decide which ingredient is truly the best part. The cheddar cheese sauce gets a pleasant zip from peppers and scallions but never enough to consider this dish spicy. I highly recommend getting this for the table.

This behemoth used to come with actual sparklers but for many reasons (primarily safety) they've been replaced with a cute sparkling topper. The rich brownie cake comes with two scoops of ice cream and two whopping scoops of whipped cream. It's highly shareable and a must for any celebration.

If you order the Island Daiquiri you get to keep the glass, which may be my favorite part about coming here. Whether you get strawberry, piña colada, or raspberry, it's delightfully light and airy. If you don't have room for a proper dessert, splitting one of these and adding some rum is a great option.